What began as a peaceful demonstration Friday erupted into violence as members of the Gay Action Party (GAP) clashed with representatives of the Youth United for Christ (YUC) in the Memorial Union Commons.
Six people were arrested and several others hospitalized after Ames police arrived to break up the fight.
The demonstration began as a sit-down strike staged by YUC to protest the GAP counter-comic book "J.C. Was AC-DC." The publication was in response to "Gay Sword" -- a comic circulated by YUC earlier in this month.
Fighting broke out when a GAP member became enraged and scratched a YUC.
YUC members retaliated by nailing a GAP to the Pine Room door.
"Well, those silly savages started it," said a GAP spokesman.
"God told us to," retorted a YUC representative.
A plane ticket to Argentina and $600 were reported stolen by one GAP member.
"You can't go to heaven if you're a pervert," yelled one YUC protester as he was dragged from the Commons by police.
"Oh, yeah? Jesus lived with 12 men and he made it," shouted GAP members.
YUC protesters then chained themselves to the snack bar and chanted, "Love thy neighbor unless he's weird."
GAP members responded by forming a daisy chain around a Commons pillar. Trying to drown out YUC, they began singing, Gay's the best in the west, gay's the best in the west."
Changing their tune, YUC members modified the word's to "You Can't Roller-Skate in a Buffalo Herd" and started singing, "Oh, you can't go to heaven in leotards, you can't go to heaven in leotards, you can't go to heaven in leotards, but you can be happy if you're a Christian."
Twelve innocent bystanders were cured of leprosy while watching the spectacle.
We're allowed to pass out hateful, misleading, propaganda because we're a recognized campus organization," the head YUC disciple said.
"And we're entitled to get money from GSB because we're misunderstood and abused and we need to publish pamphlets to convince all the people who will never change their minds anyway to change their minds," said a GAP spokesman.
God could not be reached for comment.
This was pretty funny; it was part of a whole spoof issue which I thought came out on April Fools' Day, but instead it was during finals week in February. I don't know if Campus Crusade enjoyed it much, but we did, or at least I did.